Yesterday I had a doctor's visit with a neurologist for our youngest child, and I wanted to share some of the wonderful advice he gave me. I am sure I am only one of millions of parents that look at their kids and say, "If only I had done that differently......maybe he or she would be ok. Maybe things would have turned out differently." In the words of the neurologist, "I can not scream it loud enough. To all women everywhere...IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT."
He encouraged me to let myself grieve. As parents we often have expectations for our kids, expectations of what will make them happy, what will make them successful. But with kids like ours what makes them happy is likely to look very different than what we may have dreamed for them. It's not easy to "swallow" the reality of what their lives may look like; will they be able to hold down a job, find love, live by themselves, will they be bullied. The greatest thing we can do for our kids is to give them the tools that they need to find happiness, whatever that looks like.
We are not our kids therapists or teachers, we are their mothers!
Lissa Best
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